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HGTV a lesson in relationships

Nancy often inflicts HGTV on me when she is home.  She says, I inflict boring TV on her most of the other time. Book TV or HGTV everyone in a marriage must make accommodations which may be a second screen in another room. In my reluctant viewing of HGTV I have learned some lessons about couples.  Most shows involve a married couple either finding a home, remodeling, or fixing a dwelling. These shows often focus on the couple’s decision-making. Couples in discussions choosing between the options presented to them.  Nancy often remarks to me their marriage will never last. So why would she say that?

She doesn’t know much about them, just a few clips of their interaction. The show isn’t usually about incompatible couples. No these people are often excited about new lives envisioning great lives together, in new locations.  A lot like a couple about to get married.  I think I have discerned some of the behaviors that trigger Nancy’s impending doom alert.  It is often one partner who is inflexible in their expectations, if one just has to have this type of kitchen, ceiling, etc. Nancy’s doom alert will sound. 

If a couple seems unrealistic about what can be remodeled, how much work will be required, or how likely they can successfully finish and afford it on their own, then I will hear Nancy say, “I would like to see how they are doing in a few years”.  The third trigger I’ve noticed is when a couple simply seems to have separate goals or priorities. “I don’t see how they got together”, may be Nancy’s response in this case.  This may not be a relationship that triggers the imminent doom alert. However, a relationship must be about two people with some goal to pursue in common.  In some couples it is a quality that seems absent. ...

 

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