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My Brother:

da Football Player

Yes it’s that time of the year again, a time of helmets, footballs, long passes, hard hitting pulse pounding excitement, all under the field lights, but first there is practice. For me it’s more a time of smelly clothes and a complaining little brother (Alex, alias Jimmy, says he rarely complains but that is not how I hear it.) 

Alex alias Jimmy

This last week it has been what is referred to as “hell week” here, and at every other high school in the country or least Illinois.  It is the first week of serious football practice.  Alex is a returning sophomore.  He plays center and guard on offense and defensive end on defense.  He really enjoys football and he will tell you everything you want to know and more. He talks about his favorite moments of the previous season, his good hits at the last practice; he even talks about lifting weights, can it get more boring. Now I didn’t play high school football.  I was never good at sports because I am incredibly lazy.  If it required movement I didn’t do it.  I was also 5”4 “115 lb freshman while Alex has been on steroids for 15 years being 5”11 175 lb his freshman year.  Even though we are both 6 feet tall, now, Alex has been as tall as I am for several years. He outweighs me by 30 lbs of fat, he claims it is muscle.  I think we should take a poll muscle or fat.

Scholastic Bowl was about the most physically demanding sport I played in high school.  Anyway back to the football palaver.  So far Alex’s team has had two minor injuries that I know of.  It would most likely have been more if it were hotter.  It has been surprisingly cool this past week as I am sure everyone has noticed.  Alex and his teammates are certainly thankful for this weather event. 

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Erik Davis

Elmwood High Sports 

Last year it was much hotter so Alex’s clothes were even smellier.  The Steve even soaked his shoulder pads and let them air dry, smelly shoulder pads soaking in my bathroom, the injustices I put up with.  All this exercise is supposed to be good for you, but after practice Jimmy looks more dead than alive. Alex returns from football practice exhausted everyday.  In fact he is so tired he cannot form words and usually just grunts at you when you ask him questions.  He is also quite grumpy for sometime afterwards.  He refuses to do work around the house, at least from my perspective, it seems I end up doing more.

Everybody on the team is looking forward to the season, especially now, because the first week is over. The Elmwood Brimfield Trojans or TROOO__JANS as our annoying announcer; I meant exciting announcer, Todd would say.

Nate McFadden

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We should have a good team this year.  There is a lot of enthusiasm after last season. The freshman, frosh, and varsity all had great records last year. They lost many linemen and other key players, but have lots of kids out. Many new players will be good replacements for the players that graduated.

Dax Feuchter

Many others that were good last year will be returning also, running back Nate McFadden, quarterback Dax Feuchter , Alex says to stop just mentioning the backs, he’s on the line you see.  He says mention Andy “Teddy Bear” Humphrey. Now, that Jimmy is reading this he’s offering far too many suggestions, sports stories, blah blah blah. 

Andy Humphrey

Apparently Alex is pretty good at football, but I can still take him.  I have cunning and tenacity on my side.  I do hope he has a good season, but he sure isn’t fun to be around when he gets back from practice.  If the Trojans do have a good season, I suppose Jimmy’s stories will never end, and I will have to put up with this for several years. I suppose after several years his clothes won’t still be as smelly…or will they?

Coaches Hollis and Dutton